Also, I posted the following in my personal journal the other day, but I thought it would be a good post for the baby journal as well.
Things I have learned about pregnancy (in the first trimester):
– Chances are, you know your body better than your doctor – but still, keep an open mind.
– Nothing beats a doctor who will take time to answer your many questions and concerns. If he/she rushes you out with unanswered questions, find a new doctor. You (and/or your insurance) are paying them to take care of you and your baby.
– Never, ever, ever, ever ever ever ever ever EVER google the word “miscarriage”. And I mean never. Not even if you have the worst pain imaginable and you’re certain the end is near. If you’re worried, call your doctor, and assume the best until told otherwise. It happens, and it’s painfully sad, but the odds are in your favor.
– Along those lines, take caution with pregnancy message boards. In some respects, they are full of women with great advice, but also, they are full of women with well-intentioned bad advice. They also have a larger percentage of women with “problem pregnancies” which makes it seem like the odds of having a healthy pregnancy are less than they are in the general population. (Misery loves company!)
– Whether or not your pregnancy was planned, people will ask you the dreaded “Was it planned?” question. Get over it now so you won’t be offended when someone does ask.
– Also, whether or not your pregnancy was planned, you will question yourself over and over again if your decision to have a baby was the right one. It doesn’t mean you’re going to be a bad parent – it means that you’re a human being with human emotions. It’s normal to be nervous about something that is life changing. (Nobody questions a nervous bride – why question a nervous mom-to-be?)
– Some days will be worse than others. Your pregnancy symptoms will wax and wane on a daily basis and it doesn’t mean anything is wrong. (Again, if you’re nervous – CALL YOUR DOCTOR. Google = bad in these instances.)
– Don’t believe everything you read in pregnancy books. You might get morning sickness. You might not (I didn’t). You might gain 10 pounds in the first five weeks, you might lose 20 (I didn’t). The only normal pregnancy symptom is a growing embryo/fetus. Everything else varies from woman to woman, and pregnancy to pregnancy. (I fully expected to be a vomiting nut case – I never threw up.)
– Keep the emotions of the father-to-be in mind, but don’t expect his to be the same as yours. It’s normal for men to be ambivalent/indifferent until they see evidence of the baby (when they feel it kick, or when it’s actually born). So don’t freak out on the daddy-to-be if he doesn’t cry over a cute pair of baby booties.
– Tell your family and your employer whenever YOU’RE ready. If you want to wait until 2nd trimester, go for it. If you don’t, tell sooner. We told our families at four weeks and our bosses at five weeks. I can’t imagine if I had waited longer to tell my employer – it’s been great and everyone has been understanding (it’s like having a third family!) Only you know what’s right for your situation.
– Some days you will really wish that you weren’t pregnant. Not that it’s a miserable experience, but sometimes the baby seems like a parasite (it is!). Sometimes you will just want your body back and not share it with this other growing human. Again, this is normal. (But also normal if you never feel this way).
– Take all advice you get with a grain of salt (even mine, on this list!) Every woman’s experience is different – and every woman’s experience may vary with each pregnancy.
– Don’t rush it, because you may never get to go through it again. 🙂 (This may be a blessing or a curse! It’s up to you!)