Monthly Archives: May, 2009
“Pinky Swear, Cross My Heart,”
“we will never be apart.” That’s the new rhyme (with accompanying hand gestures) my little 7 year-old girl and I made up together tonight. The day she turns thirteen and finds me highly annoying, I will shrivel up and die.
I’m Not Popular
I love how little kids interpret the meaning of so many words. Take, for instance, the word “popular.” The other day, I was driving with the Redhead, and several birds flew in front of my car throughout the drive. She asked me why so many birds kept flying in front of my car. “I guess …
Personal Trainer
I recently joined a gym, and as a new member perk I am entitled to two free sessions with a personal trainer. Today, I went to my first session. Holy mackerel – Jess was friendly, perky, not too mean but not too nice, and really helped me learn the machines. Because I am stubborn, I …
Baking Fool
Don’t ask me what got me on a massive cooking and baking kick, but I have to say I’m happy to get back into what used to be one of my favorite pastimes. After my “Big D,” (divorce) I just kind of took a break from it, since my kids generally prefer plain noodles. Making …
Product Review – Maybelline Define-a-Lash
I purchased Maybelline’s Define-a-Lash and was eager to see results like they promise in their advertising. Day 1: At first, I thought my eyelashes were being plucked out en masse. The brush is hard and unbending, apparently molded plastic in comparison to the traditional bristled mascara brush. Once I realized that tension is everything, I …
Just Be Yourself
The other night, as I cleaned up the kitchen, Druesy called in from the family room: “Mom? How do you get boys to like you?” A little surprised by the question, I replied “Just be yourself!” After a short pause, she innocently asked me “So… Then how come no boys like you?” I guess I’m …
I’m Going to Catch the Gremlin
I just got home from work. Just who is it that comes into my home during the day, while I’m at work and the kids are at school, leaving it to appear ransacked when we get home? If not for the absence of blood, I actually think an unsuspecting police officer might identify the family …
So, You Think Your Child Should Model?
Doesn’t everyone? Your baby is so precious… So darling… So gorgeous… When my daughter was young, I was bombarded by people advising me to get her into modeling. (She has raging red hair – it seemed kind of normal!) But, I live in Milwaukee, WI, which isn’t exactly the modeling hub of the world. Then …
Product Review – Simply Safe All Purpose Cleaner
I spotted a new cleaning product at the grocery store the other day – Simply Safe All Purpose Cleaner. It claims to be “Industrial Strength-Family Friendly,” and boasts that it smells great, is non-hazardous, industrial strength and eco-friendly. The price was about $2.49, almost a dollar less than larger name products. I bought it. It …
Open Letter to the Jerk who Stole my Bag Today
Dear Jerk, This morning started out great. I was on time, the kids were both happy and funny, and I was in a generally very good mood. Imagine my surprise when I ran into daycare to drop off my son, was back out to my car in 3-4 minutes, tops, turning onto the street when …